Because Losers are Awesome! That's Why!

I am a fan of Real Sports with Bryant Gumble on HBO. It really can be a fascinating show and some of the stories are AWESOME! But this month it just flat out ticked me off.

If you haven't seen it yet, and you get HBO you need to stalk for it. There is a story about The Banning of Dodgeball in schools. Yes, I know. Out of 33 followers and random readers from around the blogosphere, at least one of you has a horrible memory of dodgeball. Some of you have horrible memories of gym class and middle school in general. See a therapist. I'm not your go to on this one.

My problem wasn't so much the banning of dodgeball but the reasoning behind it. We don't want children to be scarred by losing. They need to participate in activities that will help them feel successful. Seriously? You can't let children lose at a gym activity?

But it gets worse. They showed further footage of a PE teacher training in which they were...Wait for it! Jumping rope. WITHOUT A ROPE!

Pick your jaws up people. It is real and I watched it twice just to be sure. They encourage children to use their imaginations for how many times the rope can pass under them. And why don't we use a real rope? Because we could trip ourselves and get hurt.

Which leads me to indignation #3. A school has also banned tag. They can only play "Shadow Tag" (step on the person's shadow to freeze/unfreeze them) because too many children were falling down and getting bruises and scrapes. In this economy you want to go a step further and put Band-Aid out of business? That's just wrong!

But no touch tag wasn't enough. Because things were so delightful (please pardon my sarcasm), they decided to ban touching at all. Air high fives. Air hugs. And no patting a friend on the back.

Wait. I'll be right back after I brush the vomit taste out of my mouth.

Who wants to make the first prediction as to what happens to these "Chronic Winners" when they don't get the job on the first job interview? What happens when they get dumped? What happens when they don't get into the school they want because their test scores aren't good enough?

And if we are eliminating everything that could cause injury, does that mean we are banishing all organized sports? No more Tee Ball. No more soccer. Do you have any ideas how many times I stopped a soccer ball with my face in gym class? My sister wore hockey ball badges on her shins for crying out loud! And that was only practice!

Why can't children learn dissapointment? Isn't it more important to teach them to handle losing with grace and sportsmanship than to pamper their egos and give them a false sense of self? Competition is real people. And some people win. And some people lose. It's how the losers handle it that determines their character. The same can be said of winners.

So suck it up. Take a ball to the head or the small of your back. Shake it off and be graceful about it.

If you can see through your swollen eye.

I Wonder if She's Married.

NY Giants need a sack—to cover fan’s racy outfit
As if the NY Giants weren't having a tough enough time of it with Plaxico's nonsense, now their fans have gone crazy too!

Dec 15, 9:17 am EST
NEW YORK (AP)—The New York Giants need another sack—to cover a flamboyant fan who wears skimpy outfits.

Sondra Fortunato went to Giants Stadium last week wearing a Santa Claus outfit, a tiara, fishnet stockings, a bathing suit bottom and high-heeled boots.

She also had a suitcase and two 11-by-17 signs reading “Go Giants” and “Have a No Guns Christmas,” referring to the team’s wide receiver shooting himself in the leg.

She insists nothing naughty was showing even though she’s “well-endowed.” As the middle-aged woman puts it, “You couldn’t even see my underwear.”

The Giants apparently saw it another way.

Security escorted her out, saying signs and baggage weren’t allowed and telling her to cover up because there were children present. She figures other women “got jealous and complained.”

Information from: New York Post, http://www.nypost.com/

Maybe I would feel differently if I was a rabid fan of a team. Sure she was showing her team spirit but what else was she showing? It's New York. In December. And she was in fishnets and a bikini bottom? Really? At least she was wearing boots! I'd hate for her to catch cold!

(You mean she looked something like a Santa version of THIS?)

I'm a little disturbed that she didn't buy the "children present" reasoning for asking her to cover up or leave. Why do women always go for the "they are all jealous of me" reasoning? Are we really that egotistical? Or are we that shallow? Or are we that insecure that we have to dress like tramps to get attention and then when we embarass the fool out of ourselves we have to get defensive and blame it on someone else?

And what about those men that you see at EVERY game (college or pro) who feel the need to inflict their guts and other body parts (you've seen the droopy drawers - don't deny it!) on us in person or on live TV? Were they asked to put clothes on? Were any of them escorted from the game? Just because they can doesn't mean they should. And what happened to the rule "what's good for the goose is good for the gander"?

One final rambling from my little blue bowl I call a brain. What in the world is with the fan costumes anyway? I'm all for folks wearing a jersey or team gear but do they really need to go THAT far? What does it have to do with football? And what about the people around you? Do you think all of them want to be staring at your garish attire for 4 hours while you get loaded and do everything you possibly can to get on TV so that you can call your buddies at the bar who weren't "lucky" enough to get tickets and scream (unintelligibly) "DID YA SEE ME?!?! DID YA? WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

I think this is the first time I've heard of a woman going all out (maybe literally - there wasn't a picture with the article!). And I don't remember ever really seeing women on TV all decked out in the nonsense. I'm wondering if it's a guy thing and maybe she was just trying to find a fan soul mate.

Maybe I should just come to grips with the fact that I'll never really get it.