28 Years.

You all saw the big headline of the week, right?

Your hero and mine, Mel Gibson, is getting a divorce after 28 years of marriage. Twenty-eight years in Hollywood to be specific. And you know what is getting press? Apparently there is no prenuptual agreement. That means his wife gets to file for up to half of everything he has ever made since they married in 1980.

You know what? I'm not surprised there was no prenup.

A) It was the 80's. Seriously. Who was thinking straight in the 80's to begin with? Everyone was either coming down off of the highs of the 70's or they were dressing ridiculously and getting high with the "new" drug cocaine.

B) More specifically it was 1980. An actor was elected President of the United States. The US beat Russia in the gold medal round of Olypic hockey. What could possibly go wrong in this state of life?

C) He and his wife are both Catholic. That's a lifetime thing. There is no escape clause in Catholic marriage so who would have expected to ever need one?

And D) Of the 6 movies he had done in his career, only Mad Max had amounted to anything. Who was he to know what a superstar he was to become? He was 24 for crying out loud! What kind of decisions did you make when you were 24? I was 26 when I got married - I wasn't thinking the straightest during those days. (Not referencing my marriage at all by the way but other decisions I made between 24 and 26.)

What bothers me is that ofter 28 Hollywood years they are throwing in the towel. 28 Hollywood years! Do you know how long that is to the rest of us? It's like dog years only in marriage! How do you arrive at divorce after 28 years of marriage in one of the most stressful environments for marriage? And with 7 children. That sounds like an awful lot to give up in my book.

Yes, I read the rest of the news that they've been seperated since his looney DUI incident three years ago. And I guess if you can't work it out in three years you've given it a fair shake. I just don't know how I could do it.

But she sure is going to make out like a bandit, don't you think?

I Wonder if She's Married.

NY Giants need a sack—to cover fan’s racy outfit
As if the NY Giants weren't having a tough enough time of it with Plaxico's nonsense, now their fans have gone crazy too!

Dec 15, 9:17 am EST
NEW YORK (AP)—The New York Giants need another sack—to cover a flamboyant fan who wears skimpy outfits.

Sondra Fortunato went to Giants Stadium last week wearing a Santa Claus outfit, a tiara, fishnet stockings, a bathing suit bottom and high-heeled boots.

She also had a suitcase and two 11-by-17 signs reading “Go Giants” and “Have a No Guns Christmas,” referring to the team’s wide receiver shooting himself in the leg.

She insists nothing naughty was showing even though she’s “well-endowed.” As the middle-aged woman puts it, “You couldn’t even see my underwear.”

The Giants apparently saw it another way.

Security escorted her out, saying signs and baggage weren’t allowed and telling her to cover up because there were children present. She figures other women “got jealous and complained.”

Information from: New York Post, http://www.nypost.com/

Maybe I would feel differently if I was a rabid fan of a team. Sure she was showing her team spirit but what else was she showing? It's New York. In December. And she was in fishnets and a bikini bottom? Really? At least she was wearing boots! I'd hate for her to catch cold!

(You mean she looked something like a Santa version of THIS?)

I'm a little disturbed that she didn't buy the "children present" reasoning for asking her to cover up or leave. Why do women always go for the "they are all jealous of me" reasoning? Are we really that egotistical? Or are we that shallow? Or are we that insecure that we have to dress like tramps to get attention and then when we embarass the fool out of ourselves we have to get defensive and blame it on someone else?

And what about those men that you see at EVERY game (college or pro) who feel the need to inflict their guts and other body parts (you've seen the droopy drawers - don't deny it!) on us in person or on live TV? Were they asked to put clothes on? Were any of them escorted from the game? Just because they can doesn't mean they should. And what happened to the rule "what's good for the goose is good for the gander"?

One final rambling from my little blue bowl I call a brain. What in the world is with the fan costumes anyway? I'm all for folks wearing a jersey or team gear but do they really need to go THAT far? What does it have to do with football? And what about the people around you? Do you think all of them want to be staring at your garish attire for 4 hours while you get loaded and do everything you possibly can to get on TV so that you can call your buddies at the bar who weren't "lucky" enough to get tickets and scream (unintelligibly) "DID YA SEE ME?!?! DID YA? WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

I think this is the first time I've heard of a woman going all out (maybe literally - there wasn't a picture with the article!). And I don't remember ever really seeing women on TV all decked out in the nonsense. I'm wondering if it's a guy thing and maybe she was just trying to find a fan soul mate.

Maybe I should just come to grips with the fact that I'll never really get it.

You Have GOT To Be Kidding Me!!

This is too insane even for me. Parents of teenagers pull them close and read this to them. I mean it! You are about to read some information that they need just as much as you.

"The kiss of deaf - Chinese man ruptures girlfriend's eardrum

BEIJING (Reuters) – A young woman in southern China has partially lost her hearing after her boyfriend ruptured her eardrum during an excessively passionate kiss, local media reported Monday.

The 20-something girl from Zhuhai, in southern Guangdong province, went to hospital completely deaf in her left ear, the China Daily said, citing a report in a local newspaper.
"The kiss reduced pressure in the mouth, pulled the eardrum out and caused the breakdown of the ear," the paper quoted a doctor surnamed Li from the hospital as saying.

The woman's hearing would likely return to normal after about two months, Li said.
"While kissing is normally very safe, doctors advise people to proceed with caution," the paper said.

(Reporting by Ian Ransom; Editing by Nick Macfie)"

No kidding! I just pulled this straight from Yahoo News.

Gives a whole new meaning to "sucking face" doesn't it? The next time you have that obnoxious couple in front of you in the theater or the amusement park line you may share this information with them.

But here's my deal. Did I really read that doctors in China just issued a caution to go with kissing?! Seriously? This could change the landscape of sex ed classes the world over. And to think we used to be just afraid of STD's. Now we get to panic everytime we try to make out with our significant others.

Happy making out! But be safe about it - This Public Service Announcement brought to you by your friends at The Zoo and The Bowl.

Can Anyone Spell B-R-A-T?

I am having some trouble trying to decide if I should laugh or if I should be disturbed about how coddled this child must be!

An eight year old (I'm thinking third grade?) German boy stole his teachers keys, fired up her compact and crashed it into a Volvo. Why? Because his teacher sent him out of class and he was going home to tell Mommy! Now I have an imagination but even I can't make this stuff up!!

Disgruntled 8-year-old boy crashes teacher's car

When I was eight I was still learning to ride my bike. If I was acting up so bad that I needed to be sent out of class, my parents were the last people I wanted to see!

*But this child steals his teacher's keys. Yeah, that morals lesson stuck!

*He tries to drive her car. Because his parents have taught him so much about safety and endangering others!

*And he's doing it all because he's going home to whine to Mommy about being treated unfairly? Good job on teaching your child consequences!

Over $10,000 in damages were done. In my house that child would never have an allowance again! And you know he wasn't covered by his parents' insurance.

But let's look at this again. How in the world did this child get out of the school without someone noticing? How long do you think it's going to take for someone to sue the school for negligence? And how much do you think they'll win?

The world has gone mad I tell you! Mad!!

Oh, Mainstream News Media! How I Love Thee!

Just when I think the blog inspiration well has gone dry, you do yet another new piece that just takes me to new levels and places of blogging joy! And for once I'm not going to pick on NBC. This time it's Ms. Sawyer and her network who is going to get my skewer! Ready?

Victoria Secret: Formaldehyde in Bras? So here's the story. A woman is suing VS for a rash that she developed in areas that contact her bra. Testing by her attorney's office has revealed the presence of formaldehyde in the bra; VS disputes that claim. That's the short version.

Now I took the time to actually look at some (not all 193 at last count) of the comments left for ABC on this news story and I am blown away! For two years or more in some of these cases women have been wearing these bras and having these problems. You never thought maybe there was a problem with the bra? You never thought maybe you should change your brand? You are just now putting two and two together because you saw it on the news?

I understand brand loyalty and as a woman I am incredibly aware that finding a bra that fits is a chore and a pain in so many areas other than your behind. But you are more willing to deal with rashes and blistering and SCARRING than you are to go find a new brand of bra? I don't know if you are crazy, lazy or just certifiably nuts!

Do I think VS should launch an investigation and find out what the problem is? Absolutely! Should some kind of restitution be made? Give them a refund on the faulty bras they can return to you and take the rest off the shelves. Pay them some kind of settlement? Not on your stinkin' life! Make people take responsibility for their own stupidity! You wore the bra even though it was giving you a rash! And someone else should pay you?

Well, if that's the case I'm going to go out and walk into a street sign. Then the steel industry needs to pay me for my head trauma! Or maybe the city for putting it somewhere where I could get to it.

And people wonder why children play the blame game when they get in trouble!

Stupid people tick em off! And shame on you Mainstream Media for giving them two minutes to be stupid for the whole world! But keep it up because someday I'll be able to say, "This blog brought to you by the find producers of ABC, NBC, CBS, CNN, MSNBC and FOX NEWS!"



http://abcnews.go.com/TheLaw/story?id=5195818

I'm Sparky!!

Susan from What Happened to my House? has awarded me with a Sparky! How honored am I? The funny thing is that I don't think of myself as a sparky person but in the past week I have posted 3 times about things that would be considered sparky! Blogging is bringing it out in me!! So here's my Sparky!

If you haven't been by Heather's Maternal Spark yet on your own you really should head over. This is an incredible lady who takes time to promote the creative spark in all of us. You have to love the chance to be creative. And make sure you visit some of the Sparkers that she is interviewing. Wow!!

So now I get to pass my Sparky on...Hmmm...Who is worthy? I have to pass this on to...

Kadi and the bearded dragons at Womb at the Inn(sane)
Mrs. Schmitty at It's a Schmitty Life
Sissy and her Blogger issues at Mama's Other Side
Karly at Wiping up Snot
RMD at Insanity Corner

Wordless Wednesday

There just aren't any words.

But you people still wonder why I am the way I am?