Just How Long are you Going to be In There?

If you read along with the Naming of the Project Post comments, you saw that "Lavatory Library" has some support. And I'm not against the idea per se. But I need to explain a little quirk that I have. Yes, another one! Get over it; it's my blog. I can be as quirky as I want!

I can't read in the bathroom.

And yes, I meant "can't;" not "won't."

There are several reasons. The first is pretty straight forward. I'm a mom. IF I get to use the bathroom by myself ever, I am only uninterrupted for a maximum of 45 seconds. I can squeeze out 15 minutes uninterrupted in the shower, but how am I supposed to read a book in there? Something tells me that I'm not going to even get a full paragraph read in 45 seconds.

And then you get to my real problem with reading in the bathroom. I don't like the bathroom. I don't stay in there any longer than I have to which makes the title of this blog incredibly hysterical if you really think about it. I don't do baths because I hate the bathtub. And I'm not being specific to MY bathroom or my particular bathtub. I don't like to soak. Gives me the willies just thinking about it.

I certainly don't understand the notion of reading while on the throne! What in the world are you doing that you can sit there that long?! And remind me not to come in behind you when you've been at it for a full chapter or more. Nope! Sorry. Gotta get in there; do my thing and get out.

I'm lava-phobic (I made that up. Isn't it a cool word?) to the point that I have a problem reading books to my children when they are trying to potty. Which may explain why potty training has been such an issue for our house. Mom hates the loo. I love the loo. I must be a freak. Therefore I should develop some outlandish unfounded fear of the porcelain alter and avoid it at all costs.

Geeze. There are so many ways available to a mother to scar her children now a days.

But I digress. So again, I'm not against the Lavatory Library but don't expect me to actually read "on location." Can't do it. Can't even carry a book BY the bathroom door. Makes me get a little gaggy.

Keep brainstorming people! It doesn't have to have any link to the blog if that helps at all. In the meantime I'll be wrestling with Mr. George Bernard Shaw and his plays. This is definitely doing penance for not reading the original Pygmalion.

Social Commentary Day - Woo Hoo!

I know how you all feel when I get on my soap box. Well, I really don't because you are a bunch of lurkers who won't comment unless I say something completely outrageous or confusing. Speaking of, did you hear it? I heard it for the first time this morning.

So back to soap box day and once again I am taking on the financial situation. I know it has been dubbed "the crisis" but I refuse to call it that. We all know that the economy has taken a serious hit. We all know that it was because of greed on a lot of people's part.

People who were eager to own a home even though they couldn't afford it took the plunge. Mortgage companies who knew they were taking a gamble decided that making what you can when you can was a great idea and they did the lending. Stock brokers and Wall Street execs who wanted to inflate their own stock prices and make more money decided to bundle these bad loans into investments. Guess who bought those stocks. The neighbor of the people who shouldn't have bought in the first place. Why? Because they thought they could make some money off of it.

So we all know that greed caused the problem. Can we stop covering it left and right on the news now? We know what happened. We don't need 2 Datelines in one week spelling it out for us. How does that help? We don't need everyone repeating the words "crisis, recession, Depression."

In case you didn't see the headlines this morning, February existing home sales were up 5.1%. Guess what happened on the market when they got that news? Oh look! The market went up. What can we learn? Stop being so pessimistic and dramatic about the whole thing. Focus on the good news and start teaching people to be responsible. Yes, I understand that it's serious and we can't paint it pink and call it healthy. But so far painting it black and calling it dead hasn't helped either.

But that's what happens when an optimist gets political.

In other news you should really pull up the odd news section of Yahoo today. I kid you not when I say that there are four toilet, bathroom or behind stories. Seriously! Brussels set a record for the longest line at a FAKE bathroom. Something is up with Bob Dylan's toilet and its smell. Clorox is taking on a Port-o-Potty arsonist. And an Australian kid got fined for accidentally flashing a female police officer.

Wait! Make that five if you count the lady whose dog ate $400 last week. Apparently she has recovered a lot of it. You don't really want to think about how.

I think the most fascinating story is the lady with the flaming water. I'm honestly a little scared for her. The most ridiculous part is that she has to wait until FRIDAY to talk to anyone about the problem. Sure. I'll live in a liquid bomb for a week while you take care of X, Y, and Z.

One more little brain junk bit for you. I came to a realization this weekend. You know who is REALLY responsible for the Nadya Suleman situation? TLC. Have you looked at their programming line up lately? We have Jon and Kate who started the whole thing. Add the Duggars and now the Hayes family with Table for 12. Is it any wonder Nadya (I refuse to call her the Octomom - that's just a horrible name) thought she was going to get all kinds of support and publicity for her family? Just one more railing against reality TV. Not everyone needs to be famous for being average.

From the Research Room this is T.B. Maid saying "May your water be blue and always go down."

Show me the Funny: A Dose of Bathroom Humor!

Now I know I gave you a bathroom theme this week but that was only for features. If you have another funny to share feel free to drop it in Mr. Linky! I could certainly use a chuckle after my Big Crash this week so bring it on! And now for my brave bathroom bloggers.

If you were curious as to why I am the only blogger on the planet who doesn't have a laptop, check out Karen's mini blogger. I'm pretty sure that is what Beloved is hoping to avoid.

Stephanie is giving you another glimpse into life at my house with her post about Sibling Cooperation. Don't think too hard about what COULD have happened. I think she's had enough of a cardiac workout this week.

And my pal Tu Tu came through in glorious fashion with a bathroom post not even remotely close to the bathroom! Maybe this one falls under "Kids Say!"

Did you come across some humor this week? Make sure you drop the link in Mr. Linky and share a giggle with the rest of us.

Remember! Live, Love and Laugh!