And the Neighbor Verdict is In.

I'm getting new neighbors. Well, I guess technically I HAVE new neighbors but we'll come back to that.

After three nail biting weeks, the neighbors closed their house. The new folks finally got financing worked out and the deal closed on Tuesday. Neighbors had a parade of trucks here on Wednesday moving everything out and this afternoon the truck pulled in with all the new neighbors' stuff.

I briefly met him when I offered our driveway for parking if he had more helpers coming but didn't really speak for long.

Here's why I say they are here technically. They are getting married...Tomorrow.

All the ladies reading just gasped in horror. That's right darlings. The new neighbor-ette is putting the finishing touches on her wedding while her groom tries to move all their things into their new house which they won't really be in for another week or so while they are honeymooning. They have rehersal tonight, wedding tomorrow, honeymoon for a week and then they get to move in.

I have been digging very deep to find and upside to this for her and this is the best I can come up with. At least this way when she opens her wedding presents, she doesn't have to "find" a place for them. She can just put them away with everything else. That's about the only plus to this I can find.

I of course have already started planning the grill out that will happen once they get settled. I'm thinking we could just jump right in and initiate them with all the summer favorites but if I give it to them all at once, what will I have for the rest of the summer? I guess I have a few weeks to figure it out.

Here's to new neighbors - if I HAVE to have them.

On a side note. My neighbors (the old ones) made me take a picture of them sayig farewell to their house. Could they be more cruel? I think we all got a little teary but that's what happens when you make good friends.

Thank goodness they are only moving half an hour away!

Show me the Funny Has Been Cancelled.

Since no one felt like playing along or adding linkies, I have decided that I will just pull the plug.

April Fool! Yeah I know it was a lousy attempt but how can you pull an April Fool's prank in print? I'm sure some of you will figure it out now that I've thrown out the challenge.

I was sorting through my personal memorie stores of pranks pulled and I realized that very few had anything to do with April Fools. There was the B & B sign we put on the front of a friends house claiming that it was Peggy Sue and Norman Lou's Bed and Breakfast - Free Breakfast starts at 4 AM. They were farmers - they were up anyway! The best part was that they didn't see it when they went to the barn first thing. It wasn't until people driving by started honking and they crossed back to the house that they saw it.

When we went by on the bus later Peggy had strung Christmas lights around it, donned a frilly apron and was waving to everyone with a feather duster.

We couldn't let them get the best of us so for Halloween the next year we made scarecrows of them, parked them in thier swing in the front yard and put up a banner that said "Peggy Sue and Norman Lou sittin' in a Tree." We used some food coloring to make polka dot toilet paper and TP'd their tree all around the swing. This time though we made sure to do it on a Saturday night so they couldn't do any clean up before church Sunday morning.

I failed to remember that half of my church drove past their house on the way and got busted before 10 AM. My friend and I found "severed" scarecrow heads in trash bags on our door steps Sunday afternoon. But we DID get an "offer" from a made up toilet paper company to help them market their toilet paper.

I have to give my dad credit for The Best Turn Around. One April Fool's I put a black rubber band around the sprayer on the sink - you know the ones you pull up? When my dad turned the water on it of course shot him in the face. I was outside doing chores when he was had so I missed the whole thing. Dear old Dad put the rubber band back and then when I came in for dinner asked me to fill the water cups for the table. Who forgot about her own prank?

Then you have the Great Prank War of Simpson Hall. My suite mates filled a pair of my jeans with the funk out of their fridge then hung them on my door. When I tried to pick the jeans up the mess spilled all over our newly mopped floor. We in turn put clear nail polish on the bar of soap so it wouldn't lather, red cool aid in her strawberry shampoo and a couple of tea bags in the shower head. Oh, yeah! And saran wrap on the toilet bowl. Then we went out.

Somewhere in there all of someone's personals got scattered through and locked in their car while it was parked beside her boyfriend's car but I honestly had nothing to do with that! I had called it quits with the tea bag and saran wrap.

So fess up folks! Grab the button and blog away. It's only two weeks away and I know some of you will need to do some planning!

Now remember, live, love, and LAUGH!

Show me the Funny! No holds barred edition.

Oh great fans of The Bowl. You have come through for me in such a grand fashion. I don't even know where to start. I sent out the call a little earlier this week and the response has been gut wrenching - as in no Pilates for me this week, can't breath, tears and snot rolling, laughing my butt off. (Which could be a good thing considering my Lenten Math.)

I believe I shall start with this little gem submitted by my own sister in response the train track post over at The Zoo last week.

My fabulous web designer Karen, shared a peek at Brotherly Advice gone Wrong and a great lesson in Men versus Women. I swear that brother thing could have happened at our house.

Or Sissy's house! Speaking of Sissy, she passed me two side splitters that she found this week. The first was a reflection on Tummy Tucks from The Mad Housewife, Jaci. The second was a new perspective on Spanx supplied by Her Nashville.

Hey Trisha! Did you get any glimpses of those while you were at Mom Summit? Now Trisha was very open that going to the conference last week was taxing on her but to make her brain create this take on (Mom) Blogging? {Some things are just too painfully true, you know!}

And finally my Utah contributor Trisha learned this week that she is raising a Milk Mooch. But when the Mooch takes the pants off her head she really does make a great princess don't you think? How could she not with Trisha as the Queen?

Want to play along with Show me the Funny? Snag the button over there and write your own post or drop a link in Mr. Linky (he needs a chuckle - ya'll work him too hard on Wednesday!)

Until next week, live, love and LAUGH!

Happy Groundhog Day!

And before you blow me off and say, "Sarah, you already posted this over at the Zoo!" stick with me. This isn't the same groundhog.

I was thinking about Groundhog Day last night and suddenly had a completely different groundhog memory that made me laugh out loud. That of course means that I have to share it with you because that's what my blog is about.

We had a dog growing up named Rowdy. He was dachsund, shepherd, irish setter, mutt mix. Yeah, he was a looker! He was black, about the size of a lab and was probably the laziest dog you ever met. He laid down to eat. I kid you not!

But he hated groundhogs. I mean loathed, despised, and abhorred them. He would be laying in the yard under the clothes line and suddenly take off like he had a firecracker in his rear if he saw one. He was nice enough to bury them if he ever got them. And therein is your story.

I was a camp counselor every summer all through high school and into college. At the end of the camp season every year all the counselors would come to our house and have a barbecue and play croquet and watch Indiana Jones and Tombstone and pretty much just pass out on our livingroom floor and go home in the morning. It was my parents' gift to us for a summer well done. One summer I was bidding good night to one of the guys who couldn't stay and had walked him out to his truck. Out of no where here came Rowdy dog.

(This is NOT our Rowdy Dog - but he WAS this cool!)

Apparently he had found one of his "trophies" which was about six weeks ripe, dug it up and rolled in it. (You just threw up a little didn't you?) Then he proceeded to try to climb into my friend Matt's truck. Over top of him.

This was met with, "GET OUT OF HERE DOG!! YOU SMELL ZACTLY!!"

When I was finally able to pick myself up off the ground where I had collapsed in full on tears pouring laughter, I asked, "Matt? What is 'zactly?'"

"RC, that dog smells zactly like my butt!"

Zactly has been a part of our vocabulary ever since. May you have a Zactly Groundhog Day!

Slippery When Wet!

**So Karen was able to get that outer wall straightened out. Sooooo? Whatta ya think? She rocks right? I know!! I've been hearing a lot of banging over at The Zoo too so you might want to stay tuned. I wonder if she's going to make me set up a "monkee" exhibit while she's over there....**

So if you are popping by right now that means you have probably already noticed that The Bowl is undergoing a remodel. Well, there is obviously a little tweaking to be done and my FABULOSO designer Karen is on top of it. But she DOES have a life outside The Bowl (lucky girl!) so while she is managing her life, you'll all just have to be patient and watch your step. In the meantime you could pop over to her sites and share with her what a wonderful and fabulous person she is! I know I *Heart* her! Haul booty! (Her bathroom is probably cleaner than mine!)

Karen the Magnificent's home!
http://3garnetsn2sapphires.blogspot.com/

http://ABlogOfGoodies.com/ (Wanna win some great stuff? She has a great Romance party coming up on Thursday!)
http://abogdesigns.blogspot.com/ (Her design site where you can be as gorgeous as me!!)
http://www.sillymonkeez.com/ (Her awesome line of children's tees and totes!)

Apples in a Barrel

I have tried my best to steer clear of all the drama that is going on out in Bloggy Land lately. It really looks like women being women. It started with the Twitter/Motrin debate of '08 and slopped over into popularity contests over a Wii. It turned into hate mail and blog bashing. Just pretty much one big mosh pit of ugliness. I am a non-confrontational person so I was actually repelled by all the nonsense but it did get me thinking.

You know the saying, "One bad apple can spoil the barrel?" We all can agree that that is true right? But how does it happen? First, someone isn't careful when they are loading the barrel. They let a questionable apple in. Then they forget about it, neglect it, leave it there. They never do anything to take it out.

Other apples get put in with it. They rub up against and snuggle that questionable apple. The tighter they are packed and the more they rub up against one another the faster that apple turns. Pressure maybe. And then the bad apple is done.

But since it was packed in with all these other apples it's already had the chance to spread the ugliness that is rot. And those apples don't get away. They stay there and they rub and they rot. If all of the apples aren't divided out and the bad ones gotten rid of, you have suddenly lost a whole barrel.

So I was looking at my barrel yesterday. It's not terribly full. I don't have a lot of people I consider close. And the ones I do consider close and the ones I do put in my barrel don't have ugly spots. Are they perfect? No. They have bumps and they may not glow all the time. But they aren't rotting.

I don't pack my barrel super full either. I keep just the apples I need. Just enough to keep me going on my rough days. Just enough that I can give them the good in me too without going dry.

There have been a lot of campaigns and rants and posts about bringing positive vibes back to blogging. Boost one another's esteem etc. I say, just go through your apples. If you have a rotter, get rid of it. Don't comment on posts. Don't push more apples down on the rotter. Just get rid of it. If you have some apples that may be questionable, get rid of them or take a minute and find out if they are rotters or not.

What's in your barrel? And are YOU a good apple or a rotter?

What if "Pay it Forward" really happened?

Would you participate?

Would you go out of your way to do something incredible for another person?

Would you be ok with getting nothing in return?

Would you be okay with not knowing if it even worked in the first place?

I've been watching the news for the first time in 5 years. Everyday I hear more about the economy. More about people losing their homes. More about the demise of the environment. More crime. More cruelty to animals and children. More misery everywhere.

Then suddenly it will pop up. Someone paid for the dry cleaning, coffee, McDonald's for the person behind them. And it will go on for hours at a time. But then it stops. Someone thinks only of themselves and breaks the chain.

What if we all did something that only involved our time? What if money was taken out of the equation? What if we just baked something for a home bound neighbor and went for a visit? What if we just held the door for the mom with the stroller? What if we went to visit at the hospital? What if we just gave blood?

What if we only asked that it be paid forward?

Is it even possible? Is there enough kindness left in humanity to make even the slightest difference?

I believe that there is. I believe that in these troubled times there are plenty of people to love and be kind to. I believe that there are people who can put themselves aside and think of others.

I wonder if you will.

How Cool am I?

So my pal over at Frogs in my Formula awarded me! This is my second award and wow do I ever feel special!! Thank you darlin'!

So it's time for me to share the love!! Hmmmm...who do I think is brilliant? Well there's

Sissy and the Martians over at My Kids Might be Martians
Kadi at Womb at the Innsane
Toni (my fellow dork) at Daily Dose of Toni
Jiggety J over at Jiggety Jig
B over at The X Mom
Mrs Schmitty and all the girls over at The BlubHer Overhaul
Tena and her Punky Monkeys
And of course, my hero! Trish over at MomDot!

Ladies you rule!! Together you have turned this little hobby of mine into a hospitalizing obsession! Thank you. Thank you so much!

I am a Steel Magnolia.

It's time for Mo's first round of dental reconstruction from my failure as a mother. It was supposed to happen a few weeks ago but she had a stomach bug so it got rescheduled for tomorrow. I spaced and forgot all about it until they called me for my reminder call. I had to break it to Beloved.

He hates this. He hates that we didn't do a better job with taking care of her teeth. He hates that she has to go through this "trauma" at the tender age of almost 5. I have walked him through the treatment three times and I still had to sit with him this afternoon and translate her entire treatment plan into layman terms for him. I worked for a dental office or a year and a half when we were first married so I was not just regurgitating a plan that the dentist explained to me. I was even able to walk him through tooth structures and states of decay and the whole nine yards.

He still hates it. Bless him. He is so worried about his little girl that he would rather do nothing than put her through trauma. Guess who is going to the office tomorrow morning. Not Daddy, that's for sure!

It strikes me as a little funny though. Sally Field's character had it right when she said,"Men are supposed to be made of steel or something.**" But let something happen to their little girls and they go to pieces. It reminds me of when I was 12 and I broke my arm. My dad had to leave the room when Dr. DeThomas was setting it because he was about to pass out. My mom stayed right there.

I guess it just happens when you give birth to a child. You are immediately initiated in to the Steel Magnolias. So here's to you all of my Steel Magnolia friends.