I am NOT going to make a good PTA member.

As is our usual custom, I packed up the troops at 2:15 and went to pick Mo up from school. There was Nudist drama right before we left the house and I've been under the weather so maybe I wasn't in the best frame of mind. But then I got into the carpool lane and my mood spiraled downward into the Abyss.

No one seemed to be paying attention so it was like being in line at the amusement park. A load of kids got in their cars and the parents pulled away. Five more cars pulled up to take their loads. But then there was that one person who just couldn't put the magazine down long enough to pay attention and let a huge gap grow. Finally she snapped out of it and pulled up. Now we're back in business.

Then we have the dad who apparently doesn't do this much. He waited until his son was standing beside the car to get out and carry him around to the other side and put him in his car seat with backpack still on. So now he has to take that off and buckle him in and make sure the buckle is through the seat properly. And now we're backed up again. Finally Dad gets in the car and here we go.

Now there was one car in front of me. So Mo jumps in I buckle her up as the automatic door closes, jump into my seat and put the van in gear. The mom in front of me has stopped in the middle of the lane to talk to the mom who has pulled over in front of the dumpster to get something out of the back of her SUV. And they talked. And they talked. And the line is pile up behind me and they talked some more.

Tuck is wanting to know why we aren't going anywhere. Mo is yelling at Tuck because she wants to tell me about her day and he won't stop talking about the ladies who are blocking the driveway. Munch can't be left out so she starts her "JUICE! JUICE! JUUUUUIIICCCCCEE!" campaign.

And they are still talking. Finally one of the teachers catches Dumpster Mom's eye and makes it clear that they are gumming up the works. And I hear her say, "Well, I guess we better move."

Ya think?!

I am not going to be a popular person at the PTA meetings. Say what you have to say and get out of my way. I'm not a very social person to begin with but if you want me to sit and talk about dr's appointments and dance classes you definitely have the wrong mom.

Maybe I should have titled this blog "Things I learned in the Carpool Lane!"