Friday, September 4, 2009

Why? (Part 2 - The Blog Reasoning)

So by now those of you who have read Why? (Part 1) are asking yourself a different why. "Why not just write in a journal or in a word document on your computer. You're sitting there anyway. Why subject the whole world to your raving lunatic ramblings?"

I was sold.

You're familiar with that concept right? To be "sold" means that you are fed an idea and you take it so easily and eagerly that you never know you were just fleeced, taken to the cleaners and snookered all at once.

Don't get me wrong. I love the idea of a blog. I have met some really wonderful people through the blogging communities and I count them among my friends even though I have never actually met them face to face. And I love the idea that my words reach so far. Just last week I had visitors from France, Belgium, Sicily, Singapore, Poland, the United Kingdom, and Australia. Some of those people are return visitors; some found me by accident when they were searching for "pink sludge in the toilet" on Google. (I didn't ask. I honestly didn't want to know!)

But I hate the blog world some days too. I wish I had had the opportunity to get in early like Julie did with the Julie/Julia Project. Just looking at the simplicity of her blog makes me jealous. There was no nonsense about paid ads, reviews, ethics, blog trolls, who do we like this week and who can't we stand.

So why do I continue to keep the blog online? Because it IS my journal. At one point it wasn't online; it was just a word document on my computer that I picked at when inspiration struck. Someone (my sister) put a silly thought into my head that maybe, just maybe I could get published in a magazine. So I submitted an e-mail with my work attached and promptly got a "we are not taking submissions at this time" response. But there was a second line. "You may want to contact the editor of our online publication for consideration as a staff blogger."

And there was the big sell. You mean if I put this stuff together in a blog, there is a chance that I can get a writing gig that will reach the masses? I think I did a whopping 15 minutes of research before I hit up and started building The Zoo.

When I started I was simple like Julie. Then I started exploring the blogoverse and I started finding out about layouts, coding, keywords, links, traffic counters, traffic trackers. And that is when I stepped both feet into the quicksand that is blogging. I became so obsessed with those numbers and those visits and linking to the right people and having the right people linking back and making sure that I posted x number of times a day and tweeting and gaining followers.

I killed my writing. I effectively sucked the life out of it and smothered it. And that is when I took the summer off.

Now as I'm coming back into blogging, the why has come. Why? Because I want to write. I may never reach beyond the 10 visits a day and therefore may never make my way onto a "coming soon" poster in the Barnes and Noble window.

But I will write. Because it's what I am. Because it's what I do.


Cyndi said...

I admit to doing the occassional review/giveaway when a particular product (or especially a book) is interesting to me and fits in with my blog. You won't see me reviewing diapers.

For the most part though, I feel as you do. I love to write. I love to know it's not hidden in a file on my computer. It's "out there". I also love all the connections I've made through blogging.

Great post! :)

Jenera said...

Blogging is a strange thing for me. I love it, I hate it. I hate the 'mommy bloggers' that turn everything into high school but I love the mommy bloggers that tell it like it is. I don't mind a sponsored review here and there (I do them myself) but I hate where an entire blog is devoted to money making. It's quite the conundrum.

Jennifer said...

I like to think that I can learn from other people's experiences, so when I started my blog, I remembered how it seemed to turn into a full time job for you and I know not to let myself get that into it. I like being able to share what is in my head with people, but if no one ever reads my blog, that's OK too.

I totally understood when you quit blogging. I'm glad you started back and I think in a way I'm glad you stopped in the first place because now it's more YOU again and not you trying to fit into the blog world.